I AM FUEL, YOU ARE FRIENDS

...we've got the means to make amends. I am lost, I'm no guide, but I'm by your side. (Pearl Jam, Leash)

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Please don't hurt 'em Hammer

MC Hammer has a new blog. In case you were wondering what he has been up to lately (oooh, I know you were!), here’s his latest entry (with the exceptional passages highlighted by yours truly):

"This week I'm going to hit the weights some more and perfect a few new moves I’ve been working on. This is a good time of year to workout. The weather is warming up and summer is ninety days away. I got ahead because I danced for the last six months and now I’m lean.

Still, I like my muscles hard because it helps me execute my moves with more power. I train specifically for dancing. I do full body days. Three days in a row. I work my chest and lower back and abs a lot. No heavy weight. I have to be able to explode and be quick and fast with my hands and feet.

My calves and thighs are most important for the hot moves out today. Squats with no weights will do the trick. I will also do some leg presses with about three hundred pounds just to keep the thighs and hamstrings firing.

I stay about ten days from show ready, so working out and staying fit is a must, plus I love it! I’ve already been performing and perfecting the live versions of at least ten of the new songs and I’m itchy!! They play great. My dancers and I love the freedom of the new music. We only lock up on the choruses, the rest of the song you have to freestyle with power. I’m off to the gym."


He also has some kind of inexplicable pictures of the Santana Row outdoor mall (or "Tha Row" as he calls it) which is about a stone's throw from my old house/work/school. Odd and a bit disturbing, even though I knew he was from the area. Also there is the loooong post about a dream he had, which contains this sentence:

"I walked into the sheriff's office and immediately all eyes were on me. The room went silent and you could hear a rat pissin' on cotton. My dark chocolate skin and my bold jaw line complimented my broad nose and my full lips."

And they say the internet is a forum for all to be heard. Well, thank goodness.


[via IckMusic]

2 Comments:

At March 10, 2006 2:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

That is HILARIOUS. Last I heard, he was the music pastor at some church in like Pleasanton or Fremont or something. It took me a minute to believe that blog was real, but he posts SO many pictures of himself, it's got to be. Those pics of Santana Row are funny, too - what??

 
At March 13, 2006 11:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poor MC. That's about all I can say. Poor, poor fella.

(Thanks for sharing, though. It made my day.)

 

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